


Small One

by orphan_account



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Adoption, Domestic, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-24
Updated: 2015-08-01
Packaged: 2018-04-10 23:44:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4412579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan and Phil adopt a baby; facing struggles and joy with their new child!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Intro

**Author's Note:**

> This is just an opener for you :3 just to get it going!

It was Dan who had suggested it first, ready to take the next step in his life, only if Phil were willing and by his side. Phil had been thinking about it, but too scared to pipe up incase of being beaten down. The many options were played out and discussed; resulting in many fights over a few months. 

_“We could have a donor? We’d need a surrogate too, if the donor is unwilling…”_

_“But only one of us would be the biological father”_

_“So?! We’d have a child, for both of us,”_

_“Are you_ that _insensitive?! Oh my_ God _! This is_ our _child!”_

_“Well, then we’d be_ adopting _, and_ neither _of us would be the father…”_

Eventually, the two _had_ agreed to adopting. They searched for a few tiring months, looking desperately for a couple in need of adoptive parents.

Dan bounced down the hall and into the living room, pulling Phil up to his feet, he was still bouncing on his toes. He ran his hands around Phil’s neck and slid them into his hair, running the black hairs in between his fingers. Phil beamed, his curved lips arching into a deep kiss with Dan.

“You ready?” Phil asked, looking into Dan’s eyes with a happiness that twisted with fear — yet still, undeniably happy. Dan simply nodded in reply, the same distant happiness held in his brown eyes. “Let’s go meet them,” Phil whispered.

Dan pulled Phil into a tight hug as he finished his sentence. The two stood there, wrapped in each other’s warmth and fear. The couple were off to meet the biological parents of their future child; a man and woman about the same age as the the two, with above-average intelligence and sweet, effervescent personalities. 

They left the apartment, fingers united, before climbing into a taxi, and driving toward their destination.

—————

Hand in hand, the two stood in front of a small wooden door, in a quiet suburban street on the outskirts of London. Dan reached up, fist locked, ready to tap against the door, but Phil reached over with his opposite hand and grabbed Dan’s hand, lowering it. He turned to Phil in confusion, noting the light shield of tears that covered his blue orbs. They stood in silence for a moment, staring into each other’s eyes, the only noise between them an occasional sniffle. 

Dan didn’t understand why he’d begun to cry; maybe it was because he understood what Phil was feeling, fear and adrenaline in a mixture so fierce it made him dizzy. Or, maybe it was because he didn't understand at all… He pulled Phil into a hug, resting his head on the woven beanie atop his black hair, gently kissing him. “It’s gonna be okay,” he whispered, trying to comfort the boy below him.

“I know,” Phil whispered back, with a tone that held back emotion. He squeezed Dan tighter, playing gently with a few of the hairs at the nape of Dan’s neck. From the window in the house, the pregnant couple watched as the two remained in a hug, unmoving. The tall man wrapped his arms around his girlfriend.

“They’re the ones, aren’t they?” she whispered, to her boyfriend, the baby, and to no one.

“Are you ready?” Dan asked, craning his neck so his eyes were level with Phil’s. He peered into them, the tears slowly disappearing. Phil nodded, kissing Dan’s nose. He pulled some hairs from beneath Dan’s beanie, similar to his owns, watching as the curls unfurled. Dan replied with a peck on the lips, before pulling back, and knocking on the door. Phil squeezed his hand tighter as light footsteps were heard behind the door.

The chains on the door slid to unlock, before the door opened, and a tired looking women and her tall boyfriend appeared, with large smiles and polite waves. “Hello!” four voices called, all shaking hands or formally kissing on the cheek.

“I’m Katherine, and this is Joey,” she said, introducing herself and her boyfriend, tucking her fly-aways behind her ear.

She welcomed them in, bringing them into the living area. The two took off their beanies, sitting on the couch side by side. Phil took Dan’s from his hands and shoved them in their bag, Dan giving him a thankful smile. Katherine and Joey sat side by side on the couch opposite. 

“We’re so glad you could make it!” Joey said, placing his arm around the smaller woman, smile ripping across his face.

“Thank you for letting us meet you!” Phil spoke, beaming. He pulled off his coat, placing it beside him on the white couch. Dan watched as the awkward silence arose and Phil’s face became drenched in fear. He reached over and grabbed his hand, squeezing it reassuringly. Phil didn’t turn, but squeezed it back in return to let him know he was doing okay.

“So… We have some questions we’d like to ask,” Katherine piped up, “Just some simple ones to know we’re giving this baby to the right people,” she smiled, before adding, “Not to say you’re not the right people, no! We just want to give this baby to the best people possible.” A few tears popped into the corners of her eyes, but she wiped the balls of her palms across her face, and collected a handful of papers.

“That’s fine!” Dan assured, “We understand!”

“Would you guys like anything to eat, drink? Tea maybe?” Joey asked, getting up.

“Tea would be lovely,” Phil replied, and Dan nodded to agree. Joey smiled, and walked into the adjoining kitchen. 

Katherine smiled as Joey left, before shuffling through her papers. “So, why were you looking to adopt?”

The two look at each other, eyes conversing, before Dan squeezed Phil’s hand, telling him to speak up. Phil nodded, smiling, “Uh, I guess we decided it was finally time to take the next step in our life. We want to grow our family…”

Joey returned, placing two mugs of tea in front of the boys and carefully handing a cup to Katherine. He pecked her cheek, and Dan wondered why such a happy couple were looking to adopt, anyway.

A few more questions were asked, and the two asked some as well. By the end of the day, Dan and Phil had already been agreed as to have the baby, had learnt the birthdate, and had even become friends with Katherine and Joey.

—————

On the way home, the couple walked in a comfortable silence, as the sun set on the horizon before them. Their skin illuminated an orange-yellow, their connected hands glowing in the delicate setting sun. Neither of them could wipe the smiles from their faces, teeth showing. 

“This is the best thing that could have possibly happened to us…” Dan piped up, interrupted the long silence.

“One of many,” Phil sighed in content, looking up into the incredibly clear sky, a smile playing on his lips.

“One of _many_ ,” Dan agreed, squeezing his hand tighter around Phil’s.


	2. Small One - Chapter One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Phil go shopping for baby stuff, and Dan begins to worry he's not as good a father as he believes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A fair bit of angst - AND LOTS OF GROSS ROMANCE

Curled up on the couch, the two lay watching TV, neither of them really concentrating on the pictures and instead on the warmth of each other’s bodies, and the idea that in a few short months they’ll have someone else to hold. Phil lay in front of Dan, considering he was slightly smaller than his fiancé, the little spoon. He missed the days when Dan curled underneath him much the same, but he couldn’t complain; this was perfect.

Dan played with Phil’s hair, his fingers soothingly rubbing his scalp and pulling gently at his ebony hairs, letting them fall back to his head. His right hand was resting beneath Phil’s body, gently tickling his stomach in small circles. Phil held his wrist, occasionally whining when Dan stopped. Dan would giggle, and continue, and Phil would nuzzle closer toward him.

Advertisements flashed along the TV, bright colours attracting both of their attention. An advertisement for baby furniture. The two tensed up a little – not in fear of an actual child but in remembering they were yet to set up for their new baby.

“We need to go shopping,” Dan whispered, as if talking any louder would interrupt the ad. 

Phil nodded against his chest, then slid out from between his arms. Dan whined as the sudden cold air flushed his skin. “At least we have a bigger house, now,” Phil said, looking around.

The lounge-room was about the same size as in their old apartment, but everything else was bigger. They had a four bedroom house, one taken up for editing and video equipment, one for the baby, one for ‘Phil,’ and one for ‘Dan.’ The bathroom and kitchen were bigger too. The only room in the new house (on a lovely suburban and quiet street, with a school around the corner) that hadn’t been touched was the baby’s room, right across from ‘Phil’s.’ 

“Come on, I’m tired,” Phil said, turning off the television, then reaching out a hand for Dan to grab.

He groaned in response, “Nooo, I’m comfy.”

“Well, then, I’ll just go to bed without you. Goodnight,” he sauntered out of the room, and Dan leapt up and followed him. He caught up with Phil and latched onto his back. The two halted in the hallway, and looked into the baby’s room.

“Why can’t the baby come sooner?” Phil whispered, holding Dan’s hands over his shoulders.

“Because – it will be sick if it comes now,”

“I know, but why can’t time go faster?”

“Don’t make me think about that,” Dan kissed his cheek.

They walked into the blue and green themed room and slipped under the blankets. Phil pulled Dan close to him and kissed his forehead, ready to fall asleep.

“Why do you think Kath and Joe wanted to put the baby up for adoption?” Dan asked, remembering how in love and happy they seemed.

“I don’t know,” Phil whispered after a while of pondering. “But it’s none of our business, we’re just stealing their baby for us forever,”

“It’s not  _stealing_ , you spoon. And I know it’s not our business, I’m just curious,”

“I don’t think we should ask, I think we should thank them for the baby and then leave.” Dan remained silent and he stared blankly into the darkness, before Phil kissed his forehead. “Don’t worry about it,”

“I won’t,”

“I love you,”

“I love you, too,”

———–

Phil woke up with Dan’s hand cupping his face and his lips against his. It startled him and he jumped back, laughing. “What?” Dan asked, confused and somewhat hurt.

“You scared me,” Phil was still giggling, clutching a hand to his chest. “You should wake me up first.”

“I was trying to be romantic,” Dan whined, kissing him again. 

“And it was very nice, but very scary,” Phil laughed again and kissed him back. 

They kissed for a while longer, before pulling back breathless. Dan lay on his back and stared at the ceiling, “Are we doing anything today?” 

“Yep. We have to –,”

Dan groaned before he could finish, rolling over further until he was almost off the bed. Phil reached for his side and pulled him backward, back into a hug. Dan whined and tucked his head into Phil’s chest, just like he used to as a teen. Only now, he was in an uncomfortable crane as he was taller than Phil.

“As I was saying,” Phil continued, “We have to go shopping for baby stuff.” He peered down into Dan’s eyes and watched as they lit up.

Dan fidgeted out of his grasp and threw his hands in the air like a child, “If I had of known we were going shopping for baby stuff I wouldn’t have been so shitty about it!”

Phil laughed as Dan got out of bed and immediately began to search through his cupboard for clothes.

“Come back,” Phil whined, “I want to stay in bed for at least a little bit longer…”

———-

Walking into IKEA (Phil’s idea), Dan immediately ran to the plush toys. Phil grabbed a cart, and followed in quick suit. Dan held up toy after toy and Phil would either shake his head or (most usually) nod, and Dan would drop it into the cart and move on.

They then moved on to kitchen supplies, grabbing cups and bowls and plates and spoons fit for babies. Within the next hour they’d fought over which cot and changing table, blankets and wall decals and accessories to buy. They had an entire cart filled with flat-packs and vibrant colours.

“Is that all we need?” Dan asked, heaving the heavy cart through the car park. Phil popped open the boot and the two unpacked the cart into the car.

Phil helped Dan with the heavy flat-packs. “No,” he said, folding a blanket he’d previously thrown in and dropping into on top, “We still have to get clothes and quilts, and nappies, and soothers, and bottles, etcetera, etcetera,”

Dan sighed, “Should we do that  _after_ we find out the sex?” He threw a tiny mattress into the backseat, and it bounced into a vertical position on the floor.

“I guess, but I thought we agreed on gender-neutral parenting,”

“Yeah, but we can’t completely destroy their identity,”

“I guess?” Phil said, pausing, “We have no idea what we’re doing, do we?” He laughed, and Dan laughed too.

“We don’t, and I love it,”

————

Four boxes lay on the hardwood floor with Dan beside them, reading an instruction booklet for the cot. Phil was unfolding blankets and picking which one would match the furniture and toys. “Which goes better with the wall?” Phil said, holding up his three final options.

“The wall is  _white_ , Phil,” Dan said, looking up. “You’re not planning on changing it, are you?” he asked, referring to the messy floor.

Phil shook his head, “Well – which is your favourite, then?”

Dan pointed to a bright one with raindrops and trees on it, and Phil laughed and said, “Good, that was my favourite, too.”

Dan ripped open a box and began spacing out pieces of wood and packets of screws. Phil walked over and grabbed the instruction booklet from beside him and began to help. Within half an hour and a lot of swearing on Dan’s behalf, they’d made a little white cot. Phil slid the mattress in and Dan carefully put the blanket on top and a few plush toys.

The two stood arm in arm and watched the cot, as if the baby were already in it. “I think I’m happier than I’ve ever been in my life,” Dan whispered, “but more scared than I’ve ever been, as well.” Phil nodded in agreement and rested his head on Dan’s shoulder.

“Come on, you, let’s go to bed,” Dan whispered, patting his husband’s head. Phil lifted his head from Dan’s shoulder and followed him to their bedroom, switching off the light and having one last glance into the baby’s room before curling into his own bed.

The two lay in silence again, and just as Phil was about to be swallowed in sleep, Dan whispered, “Do you think we should come out to the internet when the baby arrives?”

“I don’t know,” Phil whispered, mouth dry with fatigue, “Maybe. But we shouldn’t think about that now.”

“I know – I just don’t want anyone to find out when we’re not ready,” he whispered, slightly louder than Phil did. He brushed his fingers along Phil’s sharp cheekbones, his skin shining in the darkness. Phil hummed in appreciation, and Dan smiled.

“We’ll be ready, soon,” he whispered again, closing his eyes and attempting to fall asleep.

Dan watched his fluttering eyelashes and lifting chest. “I love you more than anything,” he whispered to Phil, knowing full-well he was asleep. “God, that’s so cheesy,” he whispered to himself, before closing his eyes and drifting off.

Phil, not quite asleep, smiled lightly, and held on to Dan a little bit tighter as if to say, “I love you more.”

———-

Phil woke up to an empty bed, confused. He pat the area of the bed beside him, it was still only slightly warm. “Dan?” he called. A loud hum was heard in the office, and he left the room and turned the corner. Dan’s face was close to the iMac screen, reading feverishly over an article.

“Dan?” he asked again. Dan whipped his head over to the door and smiled at Phil, before beginning to read again. “You alright?”

“I’m fine,” Dan said, switching tabs, and reading more.

“Whatcha’ reading?” Phil asked, concerned. He walked over and began to read the script. A parenting article.

“Stuff about being a Dad,” Dan replied nonchalantly. 

“Why?”

Dan sighed and leaned against the office chair. He ran his hands over his face and through his hair, staring at the ceiling. He sat in silence, just staring into space.

Phil sat on his lap, spinning the chair toward himself and propping himself upon Dan’s legs. Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s waist, and Phil kissed his cheek chastely. “I’m just worried,” Dan whispered after a while, as if saying it any louder would hurt someone. He brought his hands underneath Phil’s shirt and gently ran his fingers along his spine.

“What about?” Phil asked in a gentle tone, worried.

“About not being a good dad… About not being a good parent or a good husband. What if the baby is born unwell? What if –,”

Phil cut him off, rubbing his hand through Dan’s hair. “Hey,” Dan’s panicked voice had silenced when Phil said, “You. Are the most perfect husband anyone could ask for. And you with be the most perfect dad, too. And, we can trust the hospital will take care of our baby no matter what, and we will love it, and nurture it, and treasure it,”

Dan smiled lightly, “Thank you,” he whispered. Phil’s words hadn’t set him at total ease, but he trusted Phil. He only hoped Phil was still going to be there when he failed. “So much,” he added, kissing Phil.

“I love you, no matter what,” Phil said, smiling. 

“I love you too,” Dan replied. Phil smiled wider, remembering last night when Dan admitted his love. He seemed a bit more nervous, this morning.

“Let’s go set up the room a bit more,” Phil smiled, coaxing Dan into a smile too. He grabbed Dan’s hand and lifted him to his feet, dragging him down the hall to the messy bedroom. And as everything seemed to go in slow motion, Dan laughed, and watched the delighted Phil bounce around and could only imagine what it would be like with a tiny baby as a tiny addition to their tiny family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed! Stay tuned for the next chapter :) Feedback and prompts would be super cool :D

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed! Feedback is welcome, prompts too; you can send them in my inbox here or on my tumblr, fivepixelphan


End file.
